Double Sad

Sports injuries are the worst! Not only are you sad because you hurt yourself, you're sad because your body is having widthdrawl from all the endorphins you were once getting from exercising.

A.K.A. I'm injured, and I am really bummed out about it.

I hurt myself plenty as a kid/teen while playing softball, soccer and the like. But I haven't hurt like this for this long in years - probably since senior soccer season (that was the year they discovered my tendons weren't connected to my feet properly, but that's another story for another time). I was running 16 days ago and I decided to take a different path (mistake 1). I wanted to start looping back on my normal path, so I cut through a side street (mistake 2). It was a big hill, but since it was the day in my workout when I was supposed to be running hill intervals, I thought - no big deal! (mistake 3). I booked it up the hill and around the corner and after a couple more blocks, my knee hurt. And worse.

I ran through it (mistake 4) and got home, iced it and went to bed. The next day, it was still bothering me so I stayed off it and iced it again. Day 3 was better, so I ran on Day 4, and I only made it .75 miles. I had to walk-run for the rest of my 3-mile loop and call it quits.

Fast forward 12 (!) running-free days, and I thought I would be nice and well-rested. I went for an easy run and made it 1.71 miles before I had to walk. I did a couple short intervals after that and had to walk the last .7 home. Today, I'm back to not being able to go down steps.

I serioiusly almost cried last night becuase I am so frustrated - my race is in five weeks and there is just no way I can do it. I know I've done it before, but I won't be able to do it this time, I don't know how it's even possible. And that makes me feel like a quitter. A quitter becuase of something I can't control.